The Pandora Project Read online

  The Pandora Project

  by

  Heather A. Cowan

  Copyright 2013 by Heather Cowan

  Photography and cover art by Becki Kanigan

  All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means without prior written permission of the author or publisher.

  For Alli and Madi:

  May you always have the power

  to change the world.

  "He knows not that the box which Pandora brought was a box of evils. Hence he looks upon the one evil still remaining as the greatest source of happiness—it is hope.—Zeus intended that man, notwithstanding the evils oppressing him, should continue to live and not rid himself of life, but keep on making himself miserable. For this purpose he bestowed hope upon man: it is, in truth, the greatest of evils for it lengthens the ordeal of man." Friedrich Nietzsche, Human, All Too Human

  I have to agree with Nietzsche, hope is often the greatest evil of all.

  Book I:

  Creation

  Prologue

  The signs have always been there for man to follow. If we had allowed ourselves to see past our own ambition and cleverness, our current situation would come as a surprise to no one. But we were blind, and now we don’t like what we see. It has always been simple though, because the periods of our destruction followed the exact pattern of our creation.

  We never wanted to see.

  In the beginning, night held too many limitations. We didn’t want light separated from the darkness. We wanted light all the time. We lit up the entire world. We created so many sources of light that it was virtually impossible to find utter darkness. Our technology made it possible to see in the dark, to sleep in the day and have twenty-four straight hours of productivity. We were happy and thought it was good.

  Then we realized that we shouldn’t be limited to the wonders of Earth. Space was a frontier that we needed to explore and control. We started small with walking on the moon and progressed until space stations could sustain life away from our planet. We broke down the barrier between Heaven and Earth. We were proud and thought it was good.

  We started to realize that all of our progress was not without serious consequences. The air began to fill with toxic chemicals and the waters and land were contaminated. Serious weather conditions caused flooding, tidal waves and massive destruction when the land was no longer divided from the waters. Global warming caused droughts and famines. Grass, flowers, trees and fruit stopped producing at levels that could sustain our population. But we were smart and clever and could overcome any of these problems, so we were good.

  As the communication age continued to advance and we had more need for satellites and communication towers we filled space with beacons and transmitters and all manner of technology until we blotted out the sun, moon, and stars. We worried about radiation and the cellular changes we were experiencing, but the ability to communicate through calling, text messaging, email, video teleconferencing, and social media made stars of us all, and it was good.

  When the fish became too full of mercury to be used as a viable option for sustenance and the air became unable to support winged life, we became worried and wondered if it was good.

  Then we, in our infinite wisdom, thought we could improve Man and all others of the human race. That Man, the most wondrous and incredible creation of all wasn’t good enough. And like everything else, we succeeded…that is when all hell broke loose.

  Chapter 1

  I am not a monster, I repeat this mantra to myself in one form or another every day before heading out into the world I am destined to destroy. Sometimes it is, I am not bound by destiny, or I will not bring on an apocalypse, but most days I keep it simple, I am not a monster.

  I glance at myself in the mirror decorating the entryway and brush some of the dirty blonde strands out of my eyes. I like my eyes. Surely a monster wouldn’t have such pretty green eyes with little sunbursts of yellow shooting away from the pupils. I shrug. Positive thoughts like these are the ones that keep me going. Grabbing my keys, I check my purse one more time before heading out the door. Phone, cash, debit card, granola bar, extra pair of gloves, mints and sunglasses; everything I need to get through another day of high school.

  The crisp autumn air ruffles the ends of my hair and I take a deep cleansing breath. The air leaves me in billowy little clouds that hang for a second in the grey sky. This is my season, monsters are loved in the fall. I walk lightly over the frost covered grass, trying not to let the moisture soak through my boots. Climbing into my Jetta, I turn just in time to see my mom peek out the window.

  Have a great day, and be careful! She thinks to me as she waves. It is the same thing she thinks to me every day as I leave the house and head out into the big bad world. It’s not so big and bad when you are the scariest thing walking the streets.

  I will. Love you. I think back, knowing she is scanning my thoughts for my response. Doesn’t she know that the constant reminder to be careful makes it really hard not to think of myself as an abomination? Someone too dangerous to be around others?

  I try to keep my thoughts quiet until I am out of range of Mom’s exceptional hearing and slowly drive the three miles to school. As I pull into my assigned spot I see Lexi lounging against one of the white pillars that line the front of the school building. Seeing her makes me smile. Like my internal dialogue, she keeps me grounded. There is no way someone as incredible as Lexi could love anyone who might destroy the world, right? I toss my purse into my backpack, double check my gloves to make sure there are no holes and head over to where she is waiting.

  “Paige!” she exclaims as she pulls me in for a quick hug. I am always uncomfortable with the physical contact, but I know as long as I don’t touch her with my bare hands she is relatively safe. After 12 years of friendship, I should be used to the casual intimacy, but I am too wary to ever let my guard down.

  I often wonder if it would be so bad with Lexi, if I shared with her who I am, what I can do. Her strongest attribute is her happiness…it is impossible to be down around her. How would that manifest into a superpower? What evolutionary chain would I strengthen? These are the games I play to make my power less daunting, to concentrate on the good it could release.

  I smile and pull away, but not too quickly, always wary of my every move. Undeterred Lexi slips her arm through mine and escorts me to my locker. Being this close also makes me look freakishly tall next to Lexi’s pixie shortness. I am not a giant monster. The drab hallways help remind me to fade into the background, once white they are now a dirty shade of grey that often fit right in with my mood.

  Feeling awkward about my height and anxious about how dangerously close her hand is to mine, I grin and bear it until I detach under the pretense of opening my locker. As she leans against the locker adjoining mine I can finally give her a true smile and start to relax.

  “What’s with the smile?” I ask as I trade my Calculus book for AP English.

  “So you haven’t heard?” she responds, her smile widening. I have to stifle a groan as I wonder what morsel of small town gossip she is going to bless me with. In a town as miniscule as ours, you can’t fart in church without everyone knowing within a couple of minutes.

  Closing my locker, I lean against it waiting for the latest news; she turns and starts walking to first period. I realize she is going to make me work for it. “Lexi!” I yell as I try to chase her down. “Out with it,” I say as we walk to our seats.

  “You don’t seem appropriately interested,” she puts her nose in the air and turns away from me. Ugh, she is really going to make me work for it. Do I even care? Nothing can compare to the ruckus I could create if word of
what I can do got out.

  More to humor Lexi than out of curiosity I pull on one of her brown curls and say, “No really, I can’t wait to hear it. Did Ashlynn and Reid break up again?” I guess, asking about our on-again, off-again homecoming queen and king.

  “Like that would be news,” she responds while rolling her eyes and turning to face me. “Nope, and I think this one I will let you figure out on your own.”

  I repress the urge to shake her as the bell rings and Mr. Scott stands in front of the class. Looking around the room I realize that everyone has been giggling and talking about something so whatever Lexi didn’t share must be huge. That is when I notice him. Upon first glance, he just seems like an average kid. But in Painted Rock, Nebraska just being new makes you a rock star.

  Tall. It is the first thing that strikes me about him, but in a place where well fed farmers dominate the population, tall isn’t all that. Except if you happen to be a tall, gangly monster and then height becomes a huge selling point. Well dressed, OK, maybe that is the most remarkable thing about him in a place where well fed farmers dominate the population. The fact he isn’t wearing a John Deere t-shirt or something bought at Higgins Feed and Seed puts him in a class all his own.

  His black hair curls perfectly to frame his face. For the first time in my life I want to touch someone as I realize that I want to wrap one of those curls around my dangerous and forbidden finger. I mentally shake myself as that errant thought makes my stomach drop into my feet. Monsters don’t run their fingers through others’ hair.

  I continue to catalog his features and am more drawn in with every aspect of him. Hazel eyes, not especially pretty but they seem to have an unusual intensity as he stares out at the class, not at all shy or embarrassed to be new. As his eyes scan to my position our gazes lock and I can’t look away. Heat sears up my body and I almost explode when he smiles at me. This guy is bad news. I finally come to my senses and tear my eyes away, looking down at my scarred and battered desk in embarrassment. When I have the courage to look up, I am relieved that no one noticed. They were all too busy staring themselves.

  “Go ahead and take your seat, John and we can begin,” Mr. Scott finishes and I realize he has been introducing the newcomer and I didn’t catch a single word. What is up with me? I’ll have to get the run down from Lexi later and when she turns around to wink at me I get the feeling she knows everything there is to know about Mr. Make My Heart Stop and My Stomach Drop.

  John slides into the only available seat, which of course is in the front row, right across from the teacher’s desk, pulls out a pen, notebook and text books and settles in for the lecture. I am pretty impressed by how at ease he seems settling in to a new class. I can’t imagine starting a new school a month into senior year. His parents must hate him. I continue to be fascinated by him when he doesn’t even look around. Maybe he doesn’t want to see all the faces fixed on him.

  From my vantage point I am able to look over periodically and study him. I know that his presence will not make my parents happy. Painted Rock was a very carefully selected community, chosen only after thorough background checks had been completed on all of its residents. It was chosen in part because no one ever moved to Painted Rock. If anything, people couldn’t wait to get away.

  Only one other family had joined our community since we moved in and I thought my parents would die of stress before they learned all there was to know about them. This new arrival should make things very interesting for a little while. Whether he poses a threat to my family or not, the way the butterflies are still battling in my stomach indicate a shift in my normal existence. You don’t deserve him, I remind myself.

  The hour passes quickly and I know that chances are good John will be in my next class also. With only fifty-seven seniors, well fifty-eight now, in our graduating class, there isn’t a lot of variety in the classes offered. Given that he is in my AP English class, he will probably be tracted with me for most of the day.

  Lexi knows this also and as the bell rings, she jumps from her seat, grabs my hand and rushes over to escort John to our next class. Fortunately for me, so does every unattached girl in the class. We are too far away and we hang back as the other girls make fools of themselves trying to get an introduction in. I take comfort in this and let Lexi’s positive aura wash over me.

  John is in two of my next three classes and they all play out largely the same. Lexi shares the one right before lunch with us and I can tell that she is determined to grab him for lunch. It annoys me and makes me love her more because I know she is doing it for me. She has been dating Jake Turner practically since kindergarten and has been trying to find me a match for about the same length of time. With the pool of eligible young men so small, and me being adamantly opposed for my own reasons, Lexi is not going to let this fish go without giving me first opportunity to hook him.

  As well as Lexi knows me, she doesn’t know the one thing that actually rules my life, not that many do. As we walk into Physics, Lexi takes the seat directly behind the one that normally sits vacant and pulls me down next to her.

  “I know what you are doing, Lex, and you really don’t have to.”

  “Of course I do, Jake will kill me if I don’t finally get you hooked up,” she responds as she smiles at me. I know she says it as a joke, but I also know there is some truth in it. Jake has always been good about how close Lexi and I are, but as we have gotten older it has been hard to be the third wheel.

  John walks in surrounded by three of my hopeful female classmates. Sam Parker who normally sits in the spot Lexi has claimed shoots daggers at us both. She gave up the chance to sit next to John by walking him to class. She quickly grabs the seat in front of me and the rest of class shuffles to find the remaining available seats. Lexi guards the seat in front of her like a momma bear to ensure it remains empty until John is introduced. I have to giggle at the look she shoots Sam, it could get ugly if they weren’t cousins somewhere along their family tree.

  Mrs. Wilson doesn’t bother to introduce him because she knows by the fourth class of the day everyone knows who he is. John walks confidently over and drops into his seat. Lexi beams at him and I try not to make eye contact. Lexi better be careful or John will think she is after him! Mrs. Wilson announces that we will be conducting experiments in torque and movement and I am happy to have an easy hour. Given my condition, I probably know more about physics and chemistry than Mrs. Wilson.

  “Partner up,” Mrs. Wilson commands.

  John turns immediately to me and asks, “Do you have a partner?”

  As I stare blankly at him, Lexi who is my normal lab partner, betrays me and responds, “Nope, she is free.” And she winks at him to let him know that I am free in every sense of the word. I want to poke her eye out so she won’t be able to wink at anyone again.

  I glare at her as I stand up to move to one of the tables on the outskirts of the room. I turn back to John who is also standing and say, “I guess not. Want to partner up?”

  He just smiles, knowing his answer is evident. He stretches his hand out for a handshake and says, “My name is John Sullivan.”

  I shoot a panicked glance at Lexi who saves me by reaching for his hand and giving it a nice strong shake. “Lexi, and this is Paige. She has a thing with hands, you get used to it and it is a small price to pay for her sparkling personality.”

  John glances towards my hands which I quickly put behind my back and I try to cover my awkwardness with a smile. He smiles back and we move to an unoccupied table. Lexi pokes me in the back and gives me a meaningful glare, “Don’t waste this opportunity!” her eyes practically shout at me. Turning away, she groans as she realizes the only person left without a partner is Shawn Green. Shawn habitually smells like week old Chinese food and has a really strange sense of humor so I know Lexi has made a huge sacrifice to give me this time with John. Reminding her that I didn’t ask for it won’t get me out of her debt.

  The lab consists of a meter stick balanced on a
ring stand and a couple of weights hanging from the stick by string. We have to calculate the torque by moving the weights around while keeping the stick balanced. I change the position of one of the weights and begin to work the equation. John grabs paper and pen and works quietly beside me. I glance at his work as he finishes and see that we have the same answer. We move the second weight and the stick balances perfectly. I knew it would, but I am glad John also got the answer right.

  John moves the weight to the second measurement we are given and we work silently until a cough from Lexi followed by a murderous look pushes me to make conversation. “Why did you pick me?” I ask because my parents have made me paranoid and I am slightly suspicious of his intentions.

  He laughs lightly, “Because you are the only one that hasn’t attacked me like a rabid dog all day.”

  I laugh but also feel bad for my classmates at the same time. “You can’t blame them, it is hard to find a decent guy around here that you aren’t either related to or have known since you were in diapers.”

  “What about you?” he asks. “You related to most of them or remember diaper related incidents?”

  “No, I am a transplant, like you. Thankfully I was out of diapers when we moved here. I have been here a long time though.” I hope that isn’t more than I should share. It isn’t anything he couldn’t ask anyone in the entire town to find out.

  “So why not attack?” He asks with a flirtatious smile.

  “Just not interested,” I respond.

  I don’t realize how rude that sounds until his face drops and he quietly says, “Oh,” as he moves another weight. We again work in silence for a couple of problems. So stupid, sparkling personality my butt!

  “I didn’t mean that as rude as it sounded,” I try to break the ice that has formed from my comment. “I didn’t mean I wasn’t interested in you, I just meant I am not looking right now.”